Hearts of Patriots

260,000 veterans from *OIF and *OEF so far have been diagnosed with TBI (Traumatic Brain Injury). 378,000 suffer from both PTSD and TBI. Veterans alone represent 20% of U.S. suicides. It is estimated that 22 Veterans commit suicide daily.

PTSD is all-consuming. Spouses must sacrifice their independence to care for wounded veterans. These spouses often lose their jobs, their social lives and their sanity, yet are virtually ignored by the VA. There is a profound lack of government support to help them become adequate caregivers and remain financially stable, let alone balance their own personal desires with a veteran's erratic behavior. Many suffer in isolation, their lives swallowed whole by PTSD. The daily stress on the caregiver is overwhelming. Without help, education and support they are at a loss as to how to cope with the situation and frequently fear for the safety of themselves and their children. As a result 2 out of 3 veteran families end in divorce.

It is critical that caregivers receive the education they need to understand and accept, the veteran they married is gone forever. The combat veteran who has returned home is forever changed and their home often has become the battlefield. Although they know the veteran's diagnosis, they have no idea how this diagnosis will change their live and inpact their family. They are frequently lost and depressed, often unable to cope. If they are to save their relationship and their family they must learn to find "a new normal". They need help in locating vetted resources that can improve the well-being of both their veteran and their family. Finally, they need to reduce the personal stress of living with PTSD and TBI so they can manage the situation. For this, they need to know they are not alone. Receiving careing support validates their personal sacrifice as well as that of their veteran. The ability to connect with other caregivers helps them recognize they are part of an amazing group of people who are valued, needed and appreciated.

Hearts of Patriots is committed to ensuring these spouses are not alone in their difficult journey as caregivers. Our programs and educational resources are designed to support the caregivers personal well-being, providing them with tools and programs they need to find that "new normal" keeping themselves and their families safe.

Hearts of Patriots strongly believes that the challenges faced by combat veterans during transition into civilian life cannot be successfully met without a strong support system. We also believe the spouse/caregiver is the most important part of that network. Unfortunately, the chaos that surrounds the life of a PTSD/TBI veteran puts not only the veteran at risk but also the caregiver and their children.

While more is needed, there are many program and opportunities available to help the combat veteran, but unfortunately little is available for the most important person in the transition/recovery equation; the caregiver. Hearts of Patriots believes that supporting and educating the caregiver is critical to keeping the veteran and their family together and save. Our entire strategy is based on this premise.

Increasing public awareness through our award winning documentary, Blood Stripe - a Spouse's Story, and educating the caregiver on living with PTSD and/or TBI are core to our programming and educational programs, retreats and other resources offered to help the caregiver through journey.

Programs such as Caring for Caregivers, Adopt a Vet Spouse for the Holidays, Hearts of Patriots' Membership program, Emergency Funds and HOP Caregiver Community program both support and help caregivers find some normalcy and reinforce they are not alone.

Our website includes a resource page with active links to over 200 vetted agencies and programs making it easier for the caregiver to find additional help and support for themselves, their veteran and their family.

Hearts of Patriots was founded because its co-founders understood first hand what little information is available to spouses of combat veterans suffering from PTSD/or TBI. Megan Cain was one of those spouses who knew her husband's diagnosis, but had been given little to no information on how this would impact their relationship and their family. Without this education, their home quickly became a war zone.

Megan barely recognized her husband as the same man she had married. Angry, depressed and afraid, she struggled alone, too embarrassed to talk with anyone about the situation. She often would escape to her car and wonder if she should just kill herself. After 8 years, on the verge of ending the marriage and desperate, she started looking everywhere she could for help. As she researched PTSD and TBI, she identified resources and workshops that made her begin to understand what she was living with. It was the first time she realized what was happening was'nt personal or about their relationship but about how PTSD symptoms controlled their lives. She starting seeking the education and information she needed to find a “new normal". Together, Megan and her husband began to rebuild their lives working to keep their family together. For now, this family was saved, but because military spouses are not given the information or tools they need to navigate their veterans condition during transition into civilian life, how many more would never have that opportunity .

This first hand experience is what gives Hearts of Patriots the ability to truly understand what our caregivers need and know the type of information and programming required to support PTSD/TBI veteran spouses. Whenever possible Hearts of Patriots works diligently to establish relationships and partnerships with the community and other veteran organizations to further advance the cause of our veteran caregivers. Between the co-founders, they share 40 years of non-profit management and development experience. Their knowledge, passion and commitment to this cause gives them the ability to successfully lead the organization by creating meaningful programing, and by seeking individual donors, grants and corporate partners to fund HOP programs.

In our first year, from March 2017 through March 2018, Hearts of Patriots paired 34 caregivers with 28 sponsors for inaugural Adopt a Vet Spouse for the Holidays program. Our spouses and sponsors represented 10 states as far west as California, east to Connecticut and south to Texas and Florida.

A special SPA DAY for 32 spouses/caregivers provided a much needed break. Spouses were met with Mimosas to start the day. Massages, manicures, facials and makeovers were made possible by a team of professionals all donating their services. Each spouse received a gift basket donated by businesses and valued at a minimum of $150. A bonus of $100 gift cards made the package a $250 value.

15 additional caregivers received Random Acts of Caring and Emergency funds were provided.

Since then, we have completed an award winning documentary to educate the public on the challenges faced by our caregivers, continued to serve 50 caregivers annually through our Adopt a Vet Spouse the Holidays with an additional 45 new caregiver members accepted into the membership program each year. As a small organization our Emergency funds are limited to a maximum of $500 and reserved for those who have nowhere else to turn. We are pleased to have helped out several caregivers each year with payments to keep electricity on, help during two Florida Hurricanes, and clothing, funds needed to purchase required clothing, and transportation to accept a desperately needed job without which she would not have made it through to the first paycheck.